Even the most introverted people are social beings. We need relationships. We need to interact. We need privacy. But even the most beautiful relationships can become toxic over time. And relationships can shape your life.
What ways of thinking should you approach if you want to prolong the honeymoon phase of your relationships forever?
1. It is better to be respected than pleasant
People who are liked by others forgive more often, accept more things, are flexible, gentle and patient. There is pity on those who are excluded, punished. They tend to insist that people work in a team, not to compete. But the people who are pleasant are easier to handle than others, especially the disliked people. In addition, they are not very good at negotiating, have a lower salary and earn less money. And all these things can lead to hidden rage. When you start to be respected, maybe there are more quarrels, but in the long run, your partner will love you more.
2. Your world matters most
One of the most toxic ways of thinking in a relationship is codependence. This results from attempts to repair the partner’s problems, sacrificing their own world and well-being. At first, your partner can tell you that he has a problem, and you listen and give advice, trying to help. You care about this person, so you want to help. Over time, you can see that you’re getting more and more from your partner’s problems and that you’re entering the world’s dramas. In this process, you leave behind your own world and forget to take care of yourself. In the short term, you can help your partner, but in the long run you only hurt yourself.
3. Actions speak louder than words
We often relate to the words people say.
But does it act accordingly? If not, it means I’m not honest. And actions always speak louder than words.
4. It’s not about trying to win, but about winning
If a person does something healthy, it does not mean he is a healthy person. It’s about who you are, not what you’re doing. You should see yourself in the mirror as a person with respect for self, integrity, dignity and motivation. And if you always try to fix things in relationships, you’re wrong. You have to value yourself and admit that you also have defects, but you are still a winner.
5. Small improvements lead to major changes
Everyone seems to seek a magical solution. People want a supplement to double their IQ, a diet that will make them one day weaker, a magical trick that revitalizes marriage.
Unfortunately, there are no such magical solutions. Changes require time and countless little improvements. Achieving goals is directly correlated with the dopamine system, which makes us happy. If you propose to change 1% every day, you will get major changes over time. And this perspective is much better than the one where rush can lead to failure.
6. When you look good, you feel good
It may seem like a superficial way of thinking, but it is not. When we take care of us through hygiene, cleanliness, clothing, sports, etc., we feel better and respect ourselves. In addition, if you care for yourself, you get older, and the partner’s physical attraction for you will remain high.